Tuesday, September 3, 2013

No talking, please.

Dear Annual Fall Voice Loss Due to Allergies,

I believe you're a couple of weeks early.

But since you're clearly here, a few things:

Your presence used to "only" be inconvenient as a voice major in college, and then as a graduate student and voice teacher (man, that seems like forever ago!) . . .

However, it is, as stated above:  STILL AN ANNUAL OCCURRENCE.  And guess what?  Way more inconvenient as a parent.  All I USED to have to do was tell a few people in the music building that I was on vocal rest, and that was that...people understood.  Voice major = care of voice, and that meant  VOCAL REST.  No matter how ridiculous it might seem to outsiders.  Sure, I had to humor Wayne Crannell by trying natural remedies like icky oil of oregano and colloidal silver, and listen to horror stories of the yuckiness of Buckley's Cough Syrup, but it's just what you did...along with the usual downing lots of water, stocking up on echinacea, guafinesan, and little notepads to carry around for emergency communication.

NOW, as a parent, these steps toward vocal health aren't as easy to carry out.  In particular, the step noted above in all caps:  VOCAL REST.  Getting kids ready for school and in the car?  Not easy with very little voice.  Seriously, it doesn't matter how many times you tell them in a strained voice that, "MOMMY'S THROAT ISN'T FEELING WELL...MOMMY CAN'T TALK." -- they will still ask you random questions in the car, expecting a clearly stated response.  And they will continue to say the same thing over and over again until you (1.) validate their statement(s) and/or answer their questions, and (2) remind them about "Mommy's voice."  

Sometimes, gratefully on my part, they pick up on the pain and stress that result from Mommy talking, and the questions/arguments/statements that require feedback will cease for a few minutes.

And now, after dropping off Everett for his first day of pre-k, a few hours of vocal rest.  :)

So THERE, Annual Fall Vocal Loss Due to Allergies!

Silent Mommy.